Cooking with GOG and First Subscriber

Skyrim Part 4

The Skyrim series reached an abrupt conclusion almost immediately after discovering and killing the first dragon. I attempted to show off my shout powers in a manner that didn’t hit anyone but they still were not amused and cut me down after a brief segment of me running and hopping away. I begged for my life and attempted to yield and just pay the bloody fine but it was all for naught. I think I’ll roll a new character and get to where I was before continuing the series. Until then the short 10 minute video is a monument to my prowess in video games.

Pre-Alpha DUSK

I watched Two Best Friends play the pre-alpha of Dusk (DUSK?) and I really wanted to give it a shot. It’s like Doom, Quake, and Duke Nukem had a threesome and popped this game out. Controls look smooth and the graphics look like garbage. Perfect. So I started chatting with their twitter handle and made a pretty solid case for them letting me do it.

1st-tweet-at-dusk

I got punted over to the head honcho himself and made my case but was ignored.

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So I did the only thing that I could do and made a cooking video. I sent him a link to show him what he drove me to.

third-passive-tweet-to-boss

He liked it. Asshole.

boss-likes-tweet

Game Over Gaming Cooking

So since DUSK was off the table I had to do something else. My buddy Austin got some directions on how to make a lemon garlic tilapia dish. He proceeded to burn/ruin the dish. Now I am an atrocious chef but I can at least make that. So after some nice whiskey I decided to make a cooking video for him to follow. I hate myself for doing it in portrait but my judgement was less than great at the time. It consisted of me attempting to cook fish one handed. It went about as well as you’d expect. I lost track of what step I was on and made sure that at least half the steps consisted of drinking more whiskey. So why not. I threw it on Reddit.

It is now my most viewed video. In a gaming channel. With zero editing and preparation. Awesome. As a result, I earned my first subscriber. I told him I would make sure he was immortalized here. So say hello to Mr. Smith.

john-smith

I quickly got some more subscribers after that. I’m pretty pumped about it and now also feel like I’m locked into drunkenly cooking and making videos of it. It wouldn’t be such a bad thing if not for the fact that it would probably drive Erica, the girlfriend, insane. I’m using knives on nonstick pans, spilling butter all over the stove, and creating a stack of dishes a mile high. It can only be healthy for the relationship. The path to stardom is fraught with the corpses of relationships… I must press on.

Killing Floor 2 Guide

It’s Halloween. I have shit kids knocking on my door and no candy to give them. I figure I’ll hole up in my room and play something at least semi in the spirit of Halloween. I picked Killing Floor 2. It’s an FPS where you have to survive 10 waves of “zeds”. They’re basically zombies but genetically engineered by a psychopath. You fight the psychopath at the end. It’s laced with heavy metal and gore so it’s great for therapy.

There are a variety of classes to choose from and you’re bound to find one that strikes your fancy. Mine is either support or firebug. Support runs around with a stupid amount of health and a shotgun. You can just about murder everything and get slow motion mode triggered constantly. Shotguns in slow motion is a thing to behold especially when the graphics are extremely well done.

Firebug is pretty self explanatory. You run around madly with a flamethrower and gently sprinkle everything in sight with napalm. So I figure I’ve put a bunch of hours into him and can be considered an expert. This means I have to write a guide to playing the firebug and run him through 10 waves with some commentary. Turns out I got a solid 7 rounds and only ever had one faithful teammate. Solid LP. Hopefully the guide I’ve written makes up for its deficiency. Might do a spread on each class. We’ll see what the response is like after I hit up the KF2 subreddit.

Happy Halloween.

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